I have only seen the movie 'Prozac Nation', but not read the book(s) yet.
They're very high on my list, though.
I'm trying to write more, to get stuff out of my mind, on paper/screen so I can see it outlined and in order. Failing from time to time, though, and it's tiring.
But I try. At least I try.
The pressure about next year is building up and up and UP and today there was a humongous outburst; it was horrible.
Ah well, we talked things out and it's better now. My parents think I'm sleeping now, but I'm actually trying to figure out what the right words are to put to paper. I felt the need to write something. And that's when I thought: where else but on my blog, eh? Heheh.
My best friend in Holland (Roel) is going to graduate from Secondary School soon.
I miss him so much, it's crazy. I really, REALLY, hope I can be there at the graduation party (as a surprise), which I asked my parents to be my birthday present for my 19th birthday (expensive present, but totes worth it, non?), but if not, then... Not.
I don't know. I just wish he was here, or I were there.
No wait.
I wish we were together. But not at either place.
Maybe on the moon or something. Or at a deserted beach, at some deserted place in Portugal. Or on a ship, on a plane, WHEREVER.
As long as we'd be together, it'd do.
But we're not.
And it pains me to think that my best friend is so far away, especially at times like this.
And my other 'best friend' so close, but unapproachable and unreachable.
Looks like I'm going to have to figure it out on my own.
Me and the rest of the prozac nation.
They're very high on my list, though.
I'm trying to write more, to get stuff out of my mind, on paper/screen so I can see it outlined and in order. Failing from time to time, though, and it's tiring.
But I try. At least I try.
The pressure about next year is building up and up and UP and today there was a humongous outburst; it was horrible.
Ah well, we talked things out and it's better now. My parents think I'm sleeping now, but I'm actually trying to figure out what the right words are to put to paper. I felt the need to write something. And that's when I thought: where else but on my blog, eh? Heheh.
My best friend in Holland (Roel) is going to graduate from Secondary School soon.
I miss him so much, it's crazy. I really, REALLY, hope I can be there at the graduation party (as a surprise), which I asked my parents to be my birthday present for my 19th birthday (expensive present, but totes worth it, non?), but if not, then... Not.
I don't know. I just wish he was here, or I were there.
No wait.
I wish we were together. But not at either place.
Maybe on the moon or something. Or at a deserted beach, at some deserted place in Portugal. Or on a ship, on a plane, WHEREVER.
As long as we'd be together, it'd do.
But we're not.
And it pains me to think that my best friend is so far away, especially at times like this.
And my other 'best friend' so close, but unapproachable and unreachable.
Looks like I'm going to have to figure it out on my own.
Me and the rest of the prozac nation.
1 comment:
Lieve Camilla,
Het is alweer te lang geleden dat ik jou heb gesproken. Aargh, wat haat ik drukte soms. How are you doing? Ik hoop dat het allemaal een beetje goed met je gaat en dat er een beetje stabiliteit is. Gaat het goed met je moeder? Las ergens wat over d'r...Hier is alles zo als normaal, hoewel ze bijna gaan beginnen met de sloop van de school, wat ik echt raar ga vinden, want dan is de reunie straks in een totaal vreemd, kaal gebouw voor ons. Hmm. Nog maar een paar weekjes school, and soon holiday! Let me know how you are doing, misschien kunnen we snel even skypen want ik heb het gevoel dat ik je nu écht al heel lang niet meer heb gesproken.
Much love for you,
xo,
Charlotte
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